About the most hilarious thing that's happened to me in the past two days as I've been sitting at my computer writing a report for work about two lesbians with tattoos who want to adopt one of the lesbian's younger sisters who is thirteen and a fire-setter (I'm also a social worker, remember?) is that I heard a comedian say:
"Yoga can be defined as one hour of trying not to fart." You'll get this if you've ever done yoga.
So when I went to yoga today (okay, I lied, I did leave the house for a short time), I was constantly thinking about this. I don't personally have to hold in gas at yoga, but I am wondering if everyone around me does. My God, I've been going to yoga for years and have not heard anyone fart. How c
an that be possible with all of the crazy poses you do including "happy baby" (lying on your back, legs spread and bent, holding the pads of your feet as if you're pushing out a baby - try not to crap the floor) or the "wind removing" pose (I am not kidding, this is a real name for a pose. You are lying on your back with one leg pulled to your chest the other extended straight, like you might do in the privacy of your own home when you have a cramp).So today, my yoga instructor, who is SO freaking funny sometimes, has this non-yoga exercise she has us do that she calls "yoga butt." Basically, from standing, you lean over, put your hands on the floor, raise one leg (bent) in the air and pump your foot up to the ceiling. It's a good workout for the glutes. So today, Carol says "I smell some yoga butt coming on." The girl beside me, who has only been coming to yoga for a month or so says "Sorry, that was me." I wasn't sure if she meant that her butt smelled from doing yoga or if she had farted, but it was priceless.
So watch. Next Tuesday at yoga, I am going to shart or something. After all of my years of holding it in. I guess I deserve that.
